Hindi SMS and Jokes

Jinke bo hota hey, bo hatt meyn hilate heyn
Jinke bo nehni hota heyn bo ungly laga kar hilate heyn.
Pata hey kya hey bo ? Bo hey tooth brush.
………… ……… ……… ……… ……… .
A child had never seen his hips
Once his teacher hit him on his hips.
Childn come back to home & see the mirror,
& said
Kamini ne do tukde kar diye.
………… ……… ……… ……… ……… .
Biwi ka antim sanskar kar ek aadmi ghar ja raha tha.
Achanak….. Bijli chamki tufan Aaya aur barish Hui,
Dukhi Aadmi bola “Lagta Hai Pahuch Gayi.”
………… ……… ……… ……… ……… .
KABHI KABHI
MERE DIL ME
KHAYAL AATA HAI……..
..
..
..
KABHI KABHI
MERE DIL ME
KHAYAL AATA HAI……..
KAHA THANA
KABHI KABHI AATA HAI,
AAJ NAHI AAYA
AANE KE BAAD BATAUNGA….

Shayari SMS

Garmiye hasrat ke nakam se jalte hai
Hum chiragon ki tarah shaam se jalte hai…
Jab aata hai tera naam mere naam ke saath..
Naa Jane kyon log hamare naam se jalte hai.
………… ……… ……… ………
Ek pal mein Jo aakar gujar jaaye
Yeh hawa ka who jhoka hai ..aur kuch nahi
Pyar kahti hai duniya jise,
Ek rangeen dhokha hai .. Aur kuch nahi
………… ……… ……… ………
Sirf yaado ka silsila rahe gaya,
Khuda Jane unse hamara kya rishta rahe gaya,
Ek chand chhup gaya Jane kaha,
Ek sitara use dhundhta rahe gaya
………… ……… ……… ………
Dua karte hai hum sar jhuka kar,
Aye dost TU manjil ko paye.
Kabhi teri raho me andhera aaye,
To roshni ke liye khuda hame jalaye….!
 

Hindi Jokes SMS

“Wakil Sahab! Mere Pati Bahut Hi Gande, Ghatiya, Dhokebaj Insaan Hai.”
Wakil Ne Hairaan Hote Hue Puchha- “Magar Aap Aisi Baat Kaise Kah Sakati Hai?”
“Kyonki Mere Ek Bhi Bachche Ki Shakl Unse Nahi Milti.” Simaran Ne Uttar Diya.

Vidhan Sabha Me Bahas Ke Dauraan Simaran Vidhayak Ne Vipakshi Neta Raju Se Kaha- “Muje Malum Hai, Aap Kiske Isharo Par Bol Rahe Hai.”
Vipakshi Neta Ne Kaha- “Yaha Bahas Me Aap Meri Patni Ko Kyo Ghasit Rahi Hai?”

Davaa Vikretaa Raju Ne Davaa Ki Prashnsa Karte Hue Kaha- “Kaisa Bhi Gala Kharab Ho, Is Davaa Se Ekdam Thik Ho Jayegaa.”
Is Par Simaran Ki Chh Varshiya Putri Dipa Ne Kaha- “Mammi Le Lo, Papa Bhi Apne Swetar Ka Galaa Kharab Bata Rahe The.”

Baatuni Simaran Ne Raju Ka Dhyaan Apne Kesh-Vinyaas Ki Or Aakrusht Karaate Hue Puchha- “Kyo Ji, Kano Ko Baalo Se Dhakkar Kaisi Lagati Hu?”
“Kano Ke Bajaay Munh Ko Baalo Se Dhak Liya Hota, To Jyadaa Achchhi Lagti.” Raju Muskurakar Bolaa.

Moti, Bedaul, Fasionable Simaran Ne Sabjiyaa Kharidate Samay Lauki Me Nakhun Gaadakar Dekha, Bhindi Ki Nauk Todkar Dekhi, Ninbu Ko Dabaa-Dabaakar Parkhaa, Tamaatar Ki Sakhti Ka Jaayja Liya, To Sabji Wala Tanik Khijakar Bola- “Madam, Maaf Kijiyega, Kya Aap Itni Jaanch-Parakh Me Paas Ho Sakti Hai?”

SMS Jokes in Hindi

Simaran Apne Purane Premi Raju Se Milane Uske Ghar Par Pahunchi.
Raju Apne Chhote-Chhote Bachcho Par Bigad Rahe The.
“Ullu Ka Pattha… Shaitan Ka Bachcha….. Suvar…. .”
Tabhi Samane Se Aati Simaran Bol Uthi- “Kya Baat Hai? Kyo Savere-Savere Apne Rishtedaaro Ko Yaad Kar Rahe Ho.”

Chintu-Pinki Ne Jab Ek-Dusre Ko Shadi Karne Ka Vachan Diya To Pinki Boli- “Magar Dear, Ek Baat Mai Pahle Hi Saaph Kar Dun.”
‘Kya?”
“Muje Khana Bananaa Nahi Ataa.”
“Koi Baat Nahi Priy.” Chintu Bola- “Mai Bhi Pahle Hi Ek Baat Saaf Kar Deta Hu.”
“Kya?”
“Mai Ek Kavi Hu…. Mere Ghar Me Pakaane Ke Lie Kuchh Hota Hi Nahi Hai.” Chintu Bola.

Simaran Ek Hi Pyar Ki Rat Lagati Hui Boli- Mai Tumhe Chahti Hu… Mai Tumhe Chahti Hu.”
“To Fir Tum Mere Sath Shadi Kyo Nahi Kar Leti Simaran?” Raju Bola.
“Please, Apni Jaban Se Mat Firi.” Simaran Ne Munh Banaate Hue Kaha.

Ek Roj Hamare Yaha Party Thi. Saari Taiyariya Ho Chuki Thi. Mai Table Set Kar Rahi Thi. Kaam Jaldi Ho Jaye, Yah Sochkar Maine Apne Miyaa Raju Ko Almari Se Chainaa Plate Nikalne Ko Kaha.
Thodi Der Baad Unki Kichan Se Awaj Aayi- “Suno Yaha To “Med In Chaina” Wali Koi Plate Dikhai Nahi De Rahi Hai Kaha Par Rakh Di Hai Tumne?”
Muje Us Samay Wakai Samaj Nahi Aaya Ki Mai Unki Baat Sunakar Hansu Yaa Rou?

Sangit Adhyapikaa Ke Pad Hetu Niyukti Ho Rahi Thi. Interview Ke Dauraan Prashn Puchha Gaya Ki Shastriy Sangit Aur Disko Me Kya Antar Hota Hai?
Simaran Ne Uttar Diya- “Sar Aur Paanv Ka Antar Hai.”
Saakshatkarakartaa Ne Puchha- “Wah Kaise?”
Simaran Ne Jawab Diya- “Shaastriy Sangit Me Log Sar Hilate Hai Aur Disco Me Paanv.”

Hindi SMS Jokes

Ek Sabha Me Simaran Ne Bade Naaj Se Ithlate Hue Raju Se Kaha- “Wah Samne Baitha Vyakit Najaro Me Teri Tarif Kar Raha Hai. Muj Par Mar Mita Hai.”
“Haa Wah Purani Chijo Ka Vyapari Jo Thahra.” Raju Ne Utar Diya.

Simaran Ne Raju Se Puchha- ‘Aap Sharab Pite Hai?”
Raju Ne Kuchh Der Chup Rahane Ke Baad Kaha- “Pahale Yah Bataao Ki Yah Prashn Hai Yaa Nimantran.’

Thasaathas Bhare Train Ke Dibbe Me Budhiya Sikudi-Sikudi Khadi Thi. Saamane Lete Babu Sahab Use Dant Chuke The. Tabhi Simaran Raju Ke Saath Train Ke Dibbe Me Aai.
“Badi Bhid Hai.” Simaran Ne Raju Se Kaha.
“Aap Baithiye Na.” Lete Hue Babu Sahab Ne Kaha.

Funny Hindi SMS Jokes

Raju Simaran Ki Ghadi Lekar Ghadisaaj Ke Paas Aya.
“Aap Chabi Kab Bharte Hai?” Ghadisaaj Ne Puchha.
“Raat Me.” Raju Ne Uttar Diya.
“Isaliye Itni Kharab Ho Gai Hai.” Ghadisaaj Bola- “Krupya Subah Chabi Bhara Kare.”

“Tum Hamesha Murkhtapurn Baate Kiya Karti Ho.” Raju Ne Simaran Se Kaha.
Simaran Shant Swar Me Boli- “Sab Sangat Ka Asar Hai, Yaha Aane Se Pahle Mai Aisi Na Thi. Mera B.A. Ka Certificate Is Baat Ki Gawahi Hai.’

“Start Ho Jaane Ke Baad Is Gaadi Ka Break Hi Nahi Lagta.” Simaran Ne Raju Se Kaha.
“Kya Tumne Bhi Is Gaadi Ko Drive Kiya Tha.” Raju Ne Puchha.
“Haa.” Simaran Ne Batayaa.
“Tabhi To Tumharaa Asar Is Gaadi Par Pad Gayaa Hai.” Raju Ne Chhinta Diya.

Mahila Neta Simaran Aurato Ki Ajadi Ke Paksh Me Bhashan De Rahi Thi. Wah Aurato Ko Dimaagi Taur Par Purusho Se Uchch Siddh Karna Chahti Thi. Usne Kaha- “Akhir Pagalkhane Adhiktar Purusho Se Hi Kyo Bhar Rahe Hai? Diwane Adhiktar Purush Hi Kyo Hote Hai?”
Tabhi Waha Maujud Logo Me Upsthit Simaran Ke Premi Raju Ki Awaj Aai. “Are, Unko Diwanaa Banayaa Kisne?”

Sangitakar Raju Se Simaran Ne Kaha- “Kya Aaj Raat Ke Liye Aap Apna Sitaar Aur Tabalaa Muje De Sakte Hai?”
Kyo…. Kya Mera Gana Sun-Sunakar Aaj Aapka Bhi Man Gane Ko Kar Raha Hai?” Kalakaar Raju Ne Kaha.
‘Nahi Aaj Mai Aaram Se Sona Chahti Hu.” Simaran Ne Jawab Diya.

Hindi Jokes SMS

Teacher- “Bachcho, Jo Kuchh Puchhna Ho Puchh Lo. Ab Pariksha Najadik Aa Gayi Hai.”
Ravi- “Bas Aap Itnaa Bata Dijie Ki Prashn-Patra Kis Pres Me Chhap Rahe Hai?”

Kaafi Raat Gaye Ghar Lautane Ke Baad Ravi Ne Minu Se Apni Safai Pesh Karne Ki Koshish Karte Hue Kaha- “Tumhe Pata Hai, Muje Ghar Lautane Me Itni Der Kyo Ho Gayi.”
“Janti Hu. Lekin Tum Apni Mangadhat Kahani Sunaakar Apne Dil Ka Boj Halkaa Kar Lo.”

Chacha- “Ravi, Tu Bada Shaitan Hai.”
Ravi- “Aisa Mat Kahnaa Chachaji, Nahi To Log Aapko Shaitaan Ka Chacha Kahkar Bulayenge.”

Ravi Ke Aspataal Me Daakhil Hone Ki Khabar Paakar Amit Use Dekhne Aspataal Pahuncha. Uske Sar Par, Badan Par Jaha- Taha Pattiya Bandhi Dekh Usne Hairan Hokar Kaha- “Yaar, Abhi Shaam Ko Chh Baje To Maine Tumhe Achchha Khasha Dekha Tha. Tum Minu Ke Sath Juhu Bich Par Baithe The, Achanak Yah Kya Ho Gaya?”
“Yaar, Jo Tumane Dekhaa Thaa Wahi To Meri Patni Ne Bhi Dekh Liya Tha.” Ravi Ne Kaha- “Wah Apne Police Inspektar Bhai Ke Sath Us Samay Waha Ghum Rahi Thi.”

Ravi- “Tumhari Umr Kya Hai?”
Rakesh- “Baarah Saal.”
Ravi- “Pichhle Varsh Bhi Tumne Yahi Kaha Tha.”
Rakesh- “To Kya Mai Apni Baat Par Atal Na Rahu?”